Took a drive down south with my car. Had the map I printed off the internet placed right there in front for all eyes to see on the dashboard. Had CDs burned for the journey. Just low life unheard-off depressing tunes from locals and abroad, the ones that are not yet known on the international status and blasted their hatred of living just for love on the stereos. Crackling the volume. Old Nissan had nothing left to it. Brought down from my grandfather to father and now the son drives it down south to see the island. A pity waste that it was given in the end to a college drop out. A son without money, a son without a job and a son with nothing to give. Nothing to take. Just a lost soul betrayed by the reality of the world. By damned the infrastructure. An angry kid that never learned to grow up. Face it, child! Get up and do something. His voice rings in my head. Ominous and echoing at the back of the cave. Yes, I have done some wrong in my life. Some wrongs which lasted and stayed, cursing every step I took later. Trying to move forward but every pavement my feet end up are on muddy ink spots. I have lost all faith for a better coming ahead off me accept for the map on the dashboard ahead of me. It is the quest that I gave myself to do. Just drive away from the place and leave everything behind. I am not starting anew, I am running away.
The Old Nissan starts to jerk and the steering wheel sways right and left. I did not notice the speed I was driving on. It is only above 100km/h on a 110km highway. She is begging me to not go further than that any more and I listened because I am afraid. She might sway out of control and I will not control her at that speed, she would also roll and we would find death on the tar like so many others. I am lying to myself because I then told myself, so is everybody else, but the fact is; not everybody is afraid of death only the cowards. Without us the brave will not exist at all.